Yesterday I enjoyed a foray into Polish gastronomy, and discovered the joys of sorrel soup. But it was too easy.

So I decided to try and make my own sausages using halal meat from the ethnic food stores on Brick Lane. Turns out there’s a reason somebody invented a device for this purpose.

(Parental warning – this video contains strong language and scenes of a sexual nature)

(The audio occasionally goes slightly out of sync – apologies)

I’m not going to write up the recipe for the sausage mix as it does need tweaking – the fat content was too low, and the spice balance wasn’t quite right. I’d like to work on this (and perhaps invest in the attachments for my kenwood) and try it again – watch this space!)

If you fancy making your own sausages, for Pete’s sake don’t try my method. Read this article and we’ll forget this whole sordid affair ever happened.